I see London

On Fridays, we are able to wear jeans at school instead of the required shirt-and-tie combination. It's pretty liberating, in case you are wondering. It touches upon those days back in elementary school where you could "dress down" and everyone would come in wearing some cool outfit. For me, it was always my tie-dyed Looney Tunes or Flintstones gear. I looked awesome.

So- I have these jeans. With a large tear in them. In an unfortunate place. Now, I'm not cheap by any means (just ask about my TV on DVD collection) but purchasing clothes is not always on the top of my list. I like to cycle through the same seven or eight outfits until they go completely out of style. It's easier and cheaper that way.

BUT, I have been fully aware that I need to buy new jeans. I just haven't come around to it (thank you very much TV on DVD....).

This lead to an exchange I had with a student of mine recently. It was a Friday and I had a group of students on the carpet to discuss an objective in math class. One student came to the carpet a little earlier than the rest and we began to have a conversation.

We were having a pleasant conversation about who the hell knows, and I noticed this student's face contorted in a way. His eyes began to wander and I was compelled to ask, "What is wrong with you?"

He stammered for a second and then put his right hand up to his mouth and leaned in as if to tell me a secret. "OH! I love secrets!" I thought to myself.

"Mr. Vest....you have a rip in your jeans. And I can see your undergarments."

I look down and sure enough, I am totally showing. What's worse is that I have on a cute pair of underwear that isn't the most masculine piece of clothing I have. This caused the student to tell me yet another "secret."

Student: "Mr. Vest...you wear yellow undergarments? Those are bright."
Mr. Vest: (humiliated) "SIT DOWN, [student]!"

First of all..."undergarments?" Are we in "Petticoat Junction?" Secondly, shoot me in the face I was so embarrassed. Thank the lord he didn't skip back to his cadre of friends and tell them what the saw.

I spent the rest of the day with my legs crossed so firmly that I won't be suprised if a doctor will tell me I'm incapabale of having children. You know, whenever I get that checked out....