Graffiti Bridge, sans Prince

I never really understood graffiti written in bathroom stalls. It always seemed to me like a cowardly move. Graffiti is meant to be written in a clear area, where people can marvel at your work and want to copy it onto t-shirts or something.

But in a bathroom stall? That's just nasty. What compels people to sit on a toilet (as they do their business) and write something disparaging about another person? The only other people that will see it are kind of busy...but I do agree that it gives people something to do at the time.

Still...it semi-stings when you find out one of your students has written something negative about you in a public setting. Today, a sweet kid of mine came up to me and notified me that "people wrote something about you in the boys bathroom."

"Oh and what was it?"
"Mommy told me to never say these words."

I picked up my phone (to take a picture of the evidence) and entered the crime scene. Now, I was expecting something either questioning my sexuality or about how I'm stupid or something.

All I saw was this simple phrase: "Fuck Mr. Vest."

That was all. And I didn't really mind it. Frankly, I was happy they were able to spell the word correctly. Still, I had to fein shock and I let the custodians know the issue.

The only other time I remember someone writing something lame about me in such a way was in college when the person I was dating at the time's ex wrote that I was a "stuck up snob" on his facebook page. I didn't really mind it, because 1) that was a repetitive statement, 2) the kid was crazy as fuuuuck and 3) it was kind of sort of a true statement.

My second year of teaching I experienced my first bit of positive graffiti. See, the high school in the building had a set of girls who had developed crushes on me. At first I was flattered, but then it got creepy. Like, "following me to the subway and singing songs about their love of me" creepy. One day, I came to school and written in black permanent marker was the phrase, "Mr. Vest is sexy."

I didn't mind that one, either.

So, if one was the attempt to insult Mr. Vest through graffiti it wouldn't really work. I'll either agree with the statement or be flattered by it.

If you want to insult me, just tell me my clothes are ill-fitting or something.

Or don't. I'm sensitive.